Soulnames
by Lomihahamech
Summary: Skywise conciders the possibilities after the first lovemating between Cutter, Leetah and himself...


I look over at you slowly, without turning my head. The salty sweat still makes your body gleam. Your breathing starts to slow, yes, my heart has gone back to it's usual rhythm too.  
  
This was the first time we've lovemated, the three of us; you, Leetah and I.  
  
Trying not to shift the furs, I bring my hands up to lock behind my head and stare at the roof. The furs shift, and your lips part to sigh a soft moan.  
  
You roll over, and rest your head on my bare, ice-cold chest. You look so beautiful, resting below my chin, just out of my reach.  
  
I tighten my fingers around each other. I want to reach down and hold you closer to me, to press my small hands on your broad back. I'm scared though. What if you wake, see me and realize I'm not Leetah, then go to lay with her?  
  
Will I fear this always now? She is your Recognized, soulbrother, why lie with me? Because you are me? Because I am you? Yet, why do I feel you'd be happier with her?  
  
Why am I so, jealous?  
  
You moan against me. I'm cold, yes I know, I find I get cold easy these days. I can't help but gasp softly as you turn your head. Your right arm falls over my chest as you mumble some nonsense about dancing.  
  
I want to touch you.  
  
Gathering up my courage, I unlock my fingers, and lower my hands. I close my eyes tightly as I lay my left arm out beside me, and snake my right over your shoulders. You don't move, but I feel your silken eyelids twitch against the base of my neck. I can hold it in no longer, and I press you closer to me with a muffled sob into your sun-yellow hair. You whisper my soulname so softly it sends shivers down my spine. Your hand slowly finds mine.  
  
I breath in your scent as you stretch your hand over mine, making sure they are still the same size. They are, though your fingers are bulkier then mine.  
  
"Fahr," You moan softly as you shiver against me, like the first time we'd treed together. I squeeze your hand carefully.  
  
I remember how scared we both were; how timid are gazes were as we'd removed our furs, and climbed under the fur. A space loomed between us, but as the hours passed, we closed the gap and came to shiver against one another.  
  
Leetah moans from across the room.  
  
You slowly stop rubbing my palm with your feather soft fingers. I turn my head away, will you go to her? Will you, my Tam?  
  
You let out a sighed moan, lift and bury your face into my neck, as if reading my thoughts, and offering me your sweet solace.  
  
Your nose tickles.  
  
~** Tam.. **~  
  
"Shhh, Fahr." You whisper. It sends me more sweet shivers and the hair on the back of my neck stands up.  
  
You slowly push your free arm under mine, the one still holding you to me, and slip it under my head. Your wind-soft lips press against the bare skin of my collar bone in a lover's kiss.  
  
A tear slowly slides down my face as I kiss your head.  
  
It's now my turn to moan as you continue your sweet kisses to my flesh, and caress the back of my neck with your fingers. I kiss your head over and over, holding you closer still as goosebumps rise to cover me. I can't get enough of you.  
  
Cutter, soulbrother, you feel so good, so,  
  
right.  
  
Another tear slowly pours down my cheek, and I gasp a quiet sob into your hair.  
  
I feel you stiffen, and my neck grows cooler.  
  
You've lifted your head. I do not open my eyes, still afraid you'd leave, yet know you're still there, holding my head, squeezing my hand. You slowly weave your fingers into my silver hair. I feel your breath on my face.  
  
"Fahr.." More salty tears fall from my eyes, itching to open and gaze at you.  
  
I feel your silken lips on one eyelid, then the other.  
  
Oooh, my Tam.  
  
I shiver as you bring your gentle kisses to my nose, my cheeks, then softly, timidly, my lips.  
  
I open my eyes.  
  
~** Tam.. **~ You unravel your hand from mine as tears well up, clouding your bright eyes.  
  
You're leaving! I knew that you would. I shouldn't have looked, shouldn't have,  
  
but you're still hovering above me angelically.  
  
My lips part in a silent sob. A tear falls from your eye to my cheek. I dare not move. Slowly you lift your hand and cup my face in it as you use your thumb to brush the tear away.  
  
The fingers of your other hand are still massaging my neck gently. You look into my eyes as you brush your thumb against my cheek again.  
  
"Fahr," You shut your eyes as you lower your head to kiss me again. A small sob flows from me into you as I return your kiss.  
  
I feel so helpless sometimes, Tam, but you are always there to lift me when I turn.  
  
Leetah whispers something in her sleep. I tense up, awaiting the coldness that will follow your departure. Again you do not abandon me. You slowly roll to your back, bringing your right hand from my face to the small of my back. You roll me with you, and hold me as you would a fragile crystal as I rest my head on your chest.  
  
You kiss the top of my head as I bring my left hand to lie on your bare chest as well.  
  
Tell me, Cutter,  
  
can we be like this,  
  
forever? 


End file.
